When I first launched my private practice, I compared myself to other therapists all the time. I felt unsure, I lacked confidence, and I hadn’t fully established my identity as a business owner. I would find myself looking at other people’s websites filled with glowing testimonials and thinking, ‘they have it all figured out—why am I struggling?’.
The ‘Compare and Despair’ Trap
I didn’t know it at the time, but I was falling into what’s known as the ‘compare and despair’ trap – the emotional spiral we get into when we compare ourselves to others. It’s a nasty habit, and one that often leaves us feeling stuck, inadequate or unsuccessful.
What I didn’t realise back then is that we are all at different stages on our personal business journey. Every therapist whose private practice looks polished now had to start somewhere. Their website might be slick and shiny today, but I guarantee at some point it looked messy or incomplete. Over time, I’ve also learned that fancy websites don’t always equate to success anyway, nor do they reflect the number of referrals a therapist is getting.
Based on my own experience, and after coaching hundreds of therapists, I can tell you one thing for sure: referrals fluctuate. No matter how successful a practice looks from the outside, the reality is everyone experiences ups and downs. A thriving practice one month may have a quieter period the next, and that’s okay.
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